A Commentary on a Walk and a Near Death Experience

Talmage picked through the items I had thrown out of the Bogus onto the garage floor and put his selections into the Fisher Price shopping cart: several pairs of Lightening McQueen underwear, pajama bottoms, lots of pens and pencils, a hat, etc. (It was getting pretty deep in the car).

The lure of the azure beckoned him outside. He moseyed down the driveway, pushing the shopping cart and calling out over his shoulder, "Come on a walk, Mommy!" The blue sky and departing child won. As we strolled along, I listened to his chatter:

That's a tree lollipop.
Oh! A pinecone.
Look at that truck.
Let's go straight. Not left, mom.

Neighbor guy to Talmage: Are you running away from home?
Talmage: I'm going on a walk.

Those are sharks (the exposed tree roots he was four-wheeling over).

Towards the end of our walk, a neighbor gave us a fistful of daffodils and a crocus. Earlier in the walk Talmage had gnawed on a fallen palm frond. So maybe it was a nod to scientific inquiry, because when he took a bite of the crocus petal and declared, "Yum", I didn't stop him when he stuffed in the remaining petals in two big, satisfied bites.

Briton came home 15 minutes later and said maybe Crocus are poisonous. He found this on the internet:

"Most forms of Crocus are extremely toxic, it has been used to treat rheumatism, arthritis and gout... Crocus poisoning is similar to arsenic poisoning, symptoms appearing 2 to 5 hours after ingestion include burning in the mouth and throat, diarrhea, stomach pain, vomiting, and kidney failure followed by death from respiratory failure."

While Briton was reading scary stuff on the internet, I was calling Mrs. Z, my gardening guru who eats flowers. She said to call Poison Control and she would pray for us.

Poison Control: Did you try to wipe his mouth out after it happened?
Me: Uh, nooo ... I thought it was funny that he was eating a flower with such relish.
PC: What's your name?
Me: Alfreida.

It didn't occur to me that the lovely harbinger of spring, the season of new birth, could also bring on sudden illness and death. Luckily, springtime crocus are not the killers that their autumn cousins are. Sheesh! It was very panicky there for a moment. Poison Control said to always call them first before looking stuff up on the internet. And also, don't be a dumb mom.